Jeff Pearlman

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Donald Trump tells the Coast Guard life can be hard

So earlier this morning Donald Trump spoke at the Coast Guard commencement. It seemed to be going pretty well. Whoever wrote the speech did a solid job. He was rolling along. Applause here, applause there. And then …

“Now I want to take this opportunity to give you some advice.”

Awesome! Advice from a successful businessman! From the president! Terrific!

“Over the course of your life you will find that things are not always fair. You will find that things happen to you that you do not always deserve and that are not always warranted. But you have to put your head down and fight, fight, fight. Never, ever give up. Things will work out just fine.”

Now we’re talking! He’s surely making reference to the Civil War. Or perhaps Pearl Harbor. Maybe Desert Storm. There are millions of examples of heroic Americans pushing forward in the face of great adversity. Go Mr. President!

“Look at the way I’ve been treated lately.”

Uh oh.

“Especially by the media.”

Um.

“No politician in history—and I say this with great purity—has been treated worse, or more unfairly.”

Eh, what? Didn’t you spend five years saying the 44th president was a Kenyan-born Muslim? Didn’t you accuse him of tapping your phones?

“You can’t let them get you down. You can’t let the critics and the naysayers get in the way of your dreams. Adversity makes you stronger …”

Did you have four military deferments?

“Don’t five in. Don’t back down. And never stop doing what you know is right.”

Or was it five?

Right. Five.

  • Ted Mark

    Sounds like Nixon more and more, doesn’t he?

    • Bennett Kugler

      News for you, until Watergate he was a GREAT president

  • tenn tom

    He is such a dick

    • Bennett Kugler

      Except that it is 100% true. See recent Harvard study

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Once again, Jeff Pearlman has produced an exhaustively researched, elegantly written book that re-creates one of the most colorful and memorable teams of the modern era. No basketball fan's bookshelf will be complete without it.

— Seth Davis, author of Wooden: A Coach's Life