Jeff Pearlman

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Glitter Goddess

#185
You know a person's Quaz worthy when she's been asked to "smoosh a carrot cake with your butt—then sit on my face with your cakey butt." Um ... what? A pro dominatrix explains the ups and downs of her trade. POSTED December 17, 2014

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The Quaz exists for two reasons:

A. I have way too much free time.

B. I’ve always loved interviewing the cool, the funky, the offbeat, the unique.

Which is why we’re here today, holding the 185th episode of this Q&A series with a woman who goes by, simply, Glitter Goddess.

Glitter is the third sex worker to appear in this space, and she’s as unique as they come. She refers to herself as a “Pro-Dominatrix and Femme Fatale,” and offers her services both in person (if you’re up for a trip to Houston) and via phone and Skype. She doesn’t have actual sex with clients, but has no beef with people rubbing her feet, cleaning her apartment and bestowing her with gifts and such (For the record, if anyone wants to clean my apartment and show up with gifts, I’m 100-percent game). Sometimes, folks just want to talk. Sometimes, folks want her to pretend to sit naked on a cake. Hey, whatever works.

Anyhow, one can visit Glitter’s website here, and follow her on Twitter here and listen to her new podcast here. She’s never heard of Arian Foster, has no great question for Steph Curry and doesn’t fret over penis size.

Glitter Goddess, welcome to the land of the Quaz …

JEFF PEARLMAN: OK, so your business genuinely fascinates me. But what fascinates me most is that—in a profession where 99% seem to use fake photos, hidden identities—you make your own videos, pictures, etc. Does this not concern you at all? Couldn’t it bite you in the rear? You apply for, say, a job at a law office, they Google Image you …

GLITTER GODDESS: Yes, it could. I went into this profession/lifestyle knowing secrets are not secret forever. I don’t use my real name with anything associated with Glitter Goddess, so that helps and is practical for my general safety also. The truth is, I have no interest in ever working a corporate job or working for other people in general, so this ‘issue’ might not ever be a problem for me. I’m 27 and I’ve only ever worked one ‘job’ in my life which was at a picture framing store. I worked twice a week for a year right after I got out of college. On the other hand, I have started at least 15 businesses. I prefer the freedom of working for myself and I put in the time, energy, and anything else required to make sure I am successful so I don’t have to follow someone else’s plans for me. I have no corporate back-up plan, though I do have a naughty idea for breaking into the corporate world. I would love to be the beautiful relaxation specialist/hypnotist/dominatrix behind CEOs and presidents who have a hard time unwinding. My true back-up plan though is exploring different aspects of me and what I am capable of. I am also certified as a color consultant, a portrait painter, and currently facilitate personal growth for clients in private sessions. I don’t see any reason to leave what I do. It is exciting to me every day and I love having that personal connection that fake photos could never foster.

J.P.: How did you become “Glitter Goddess”? Literally, what was your path from womb to now? How did it come to you as a profession? When did you start? And who are you? I know you live in Houston, but … married? Kids? Dog owner?

G.G.: I have a cat. Not married, no kids, and no interest in being married or having kids. I do have a boyfriend. We have been together for almost three years. Monogamy was not part of the deal when we first got together and it doesn’t come up as often now, but we don’t have rules about it. Who am I? These are deep questions. I am pretty much what you see. I am a beautiful woman who loves psychology and seeing how people work. I love beautiful things, personal growth and getting my way.

The story of my start could go back to the beginning when I lived in Hawaii and had a huge window overlooking the beach. I used to put on my bathing suit and lipstick at 8-years old and walk back in forth in front of this window teasing the boys. Did anybody see me? Probably not, but that was not the point for me. I liked looking beautiful and could feel the control and power I had as a woman even at such a young age. When I moved to New York City from the West Coast I really found my dominance. I had men come over and pay me $100 to clean my apartment and massage my feet. I thought any woman would be crazy to say no to this, as long as the men were sane and, trust me, I vetted all of them. Turns out not all women want this. I did and still do and I am constantly coming up with new ways to have the willing supplicants in my life bring me more ease, happiness, and pleasure. I don’t need any of it, but at this point it would be hard to imagine my life without the men that are so sweet and such a contribution to me.

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J.P.: So I was reading your web bio, and it says you have a background in, among other things, “addiction recovery.” Yet clearly phone sex can be an addictive behavior (“I love making addicting hypnotic videos and audios”). So are you taking advantage of addictive personas? If you know someone has, say, legitimate sex addiction issues, would you consider him/her fertile ground (cha-ching), or someone to help?

G.G.: I am open to what they are looking to get out of a session. Some guys come to me with addictive patterns. They want to role play that I am the professional, but that I turn on them while they are vulnerable and I take advantage of them. That is fun for me when it is their idea. I would not do that without their prompting. Those guys truly have no interest in stepping away from their tendencies, they are still enjoying it. Here is a little secret. I actually love when people come to me for true help. I had someone find me on Niteflirt tonight and we did an hour session. He was one of the very few who have contacted me for what we might call ‘real help.’ He was disturbed and looking for help after learning that his wife had cheated on him. After the call he said, “The way I felt before the call to now is night and day different. I think you may have just saved my marriage.” Nothing beats that feeling and no one is measuring, but it is just as wonderful as when someone is totally smitten, devoted, and hopelessly addicted to me. A true dominatrix derives joy in helping someone submit in the way he secretly desires, but maybe doesn’t realize he desires. She makes him think it was her idea all along, though the hints originally came from him. This may be giving away too much, but I get all the information from my subs from what they say they would like to experience. If I am into it too, then that is where we go and we both love it.

J.P.: Another thing on your bio—“ I show women how to orgasm who have never cum.” Kinda jumps off the page. A. Why do you think so many women have never orgasmed from sex? And how do you help them?

G.G.: I didn’t cum until I was 24 so I have firsthand experience here. Some women do cum very easily and others have tried and tried and can’t figure it out. What finally worked for me was following the First Orgasm Instructions, by Betty Dodson. They worked. Her 10-step guide on the internet changed my life. When I moved to New York City I got in touch with her and we are very good friends to this day. She has amazing techniques and she has a way of humorously dispelling myths about sexuality so we don’t have to feel wrong or broken. I use some of her techniques and others from my favorite sex book, Sex is Not a Four Letter Word, but Relationship Often Times Is, by Gary Douglas. I do private sessions on the phone and in person with women. Half of it ends up being physical techniques and the other half is getting over the mental hurdles.

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J.P.: Why do you think there are 8,001 pornographic/sexual sites catered toward men for every one for women? Are we simply more desperate? More pathetic?

G.G.: I don’t have an answer for this one. Men are more visual and many men respond sexually to pornographic content more than women. There is also the fact that women have the golden vagina. Women have so much power just being born female and men are more likely to have a single digit IQ (their erections).

J.P.: I have this image of you doing a call, and a guy is jerking off, doing whatever he does, and you’re filing your nails, watching Friends re-runs with the volume off. Is that the case? Ever? Or how do you do your calls? Where? What’s the mindset?

G.G.: It is different for every call. I don’t have a TV. When I do watch something it is on Hulu or hbogo, but I don’t watch them during sessions. I have painted my nails and toenails on calls (which lots of guys are into actually), but filing them would be too loud. On a typical day I am wearing a bra and panties, since that is what I am comfortable in and I am pretty engrossed in my calls. On cam there is no time or privacy to do anything else but be present for the call. Sometimes I zone out during phone hypnosis sessions. I like how it feels.

J.P.: I’ve gotta ask: How does the family feel about your profession? Was there a moment you told them? Explained? What was that like?

G.G.: My mom is the only member of my family who knows. She was sort of surprised and curious, then alarmed about my safety, then cutely intrigued. She does not ask many questions mostly to honor my privacy, but she is naturally curious and has a doctorate in psychology. The one person I would not want to know is my grandpa. Plainly, there are some things I do that would be hard to re-frame so that he would not be horrified. At first my mom called my slaves my ‘friends’—which was adorable. We talk less about it now than at the beginning. I also teach classes to women and men about being the dominatrix of your personal and business life. She mostly imagines I do that all of the time, though I do a lot more naughty stuff that she just does not ask about.

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J.P.: I 100% don’t get “foot worship.” Feet are stumpy and weird and funky. They smell, they sweat, they’re dirty. So why would anyone wanna worship feet?

G.G.: Some people like them and some don’t. There are foot worshipers who can’t wrap their heads around what turns you on, too. Sexual arousal is such an individualized experience. I have heard that sensations from the feet and genitals transmit to the same area of the brain.

Underneath it all, there is a fetish for everything and I love the way it feels to have my feet massaged and licked. It does turn me on when done well. I take pleasure in taking care of my feet, too. I paint my own toenails and love to lotion them and exfoliate them. I take care of them as I do the rest of my body. It is also wonderful to have someone on their knees, below me, begging to kiss my feet. I do a better job of explaining the appeal from my perspective than from the submissive’s.

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J.P.: Best story from your Glitter Goddess career? The one that stands out in your mind …

G.G.: Cakey Butt! I’ll just be copy and pasting this one from my archives. I got this message on Niteflirt from someone inquiring about doing a call with me:

Can we do a call where you are a cake baker, and I am a powerful and famous food critic?

You are furious because I wrote a review for your carrot cake in the nytimes saying it was too dry and lacking hearty texture.  So you kidnap me and smoosh a carrot cake with your butt, and then sit on my face with your cakey butt and make me eat the carrot cake and yummy white frosting out of your gorgeous ass.

All until the forced cake feeding makes me admit that the cake is delicious and the review was a lie because I was paid off by your rival French cook, Lisette.

J.P.: I’m obsessed with death. It often consumes me—the reality that, ultimately, I will cease to exist for eternity. I’m guessing this doesn’t particularly bug you. Why? Why not?

G.G.: Actually, death is something I think about a lot. My dad died of cancer when I was 16. He was seemingly healthy, fit, worked out everyday, ate healthy, but did have a lot of stress in his work. He got appendicitis and the doctors found he had cancer metastasized all over his liver. We had three more months of up and down, not knowing if he would make it. After that I was pretty upset. We were close and I loved him a lot. I drank alcohol a bit when my mom was not looking, and when that didn’t work I tried spirituality. I got a grant in college to research the process of death and dying. Did people change aspects of their lives, interactions, and relationships when they knew they were terminally ill? So I volunteered with Hospice and met some dying people. From what I found, no, people did not change. I was shocked, so I did a whole interactive art exhibit forcing people to look at what they would change if they had a week, a day, one hour to live. It was packed and strangers picked up the pens I provided to write on the art, in front of everyone else, their responses to question like, “What is one thing that you are determined not to regret when you die”, and “What is one thing that scares you about death.” So when I was 21 this is what I did for fun. I asked these people to have conversations and publicly display their intimate thoughts for other people to read and reflect on. My findings led me to the idea that each moment is there to live fully and that being happy is the meaning of life for me. Ultimately, I found peace with all of this when I started taking classes with Access Consciousness. I like Access Consciousness since the tools are about uncovering what each person knows, not about believing other people’s ideas.

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QUAZ EXPRESS WITH GLITTER GODDESS:

• Rank in order (favorite to least) American cheese, Arian Foster, pop-up VW vans, Jurassic Park II, corned beef, Huey Lewis, tablecloths, Cindy Lauper, poetry, The Nutcracker: American cheese, Cindy Lauper, pop-up VW vans, “Jurassic Park II,” Arian Foster (I had to look this person up, which I am sure will be seen as shameful), tablecloths, Huey Lewis, poetry, The Nutcracker, corned beef

• Ever thought you were about to die in a plane crash? If so, what do you recall?: Nothing more than big turbulence. I like being high above the planet. My parents told me there was a big lightning storm once when we were flying from the mainland to Hawaii. I don’t remember it so I was either 1. Asleep or 2. Enjoying it. Not sure which

• Are big penises really so much better than small ones?: Nope

• What’s the sexual taboo that troubles you the most?: Pedophilia is completely unacceptable. I have reported callers on Niteflirt for it. I am not sure if Niteflirt can do anything but I hope so.

• One question you would ask Steph Curry were he here right now?: Had to Google him too. I am not a sports follower, so I’d go with, “How are ya?”

• What should I buy my wife as an affordable-yet-loving Chanukah gift?: When I was card shopping the other day I saw a card that had a little fried potato pancake creature with it’s arms outstretched for a hug and on the inside it said, “I love you a latkes!” Go for that and a meaningful note inside.

• In exactly 22 words, please make an argument for the Chia Pet: My cat will eat any plant I have inside, poisonous or not. A chia pet is really a cat person’s only choice.

• Five reasons one should make Houston his/her home: The restaurants are fabulous; Rent is amazingly cheap for what you get; You can come and get hypnotized by me; The weather is great when it is terrible for everyone else and the rest of the time there is AC; The people are amazingly friendly.

• Five things you always carry in your purse: Lipstick/lipgloss; My iPhone; Purse floss; Gift cards from my good boys to Starbucks, Wholefoods, Sephora, Nordstrom; My Prada wallet

• Would you let your kids play tackle football? Why or why not?: I don’t have kids, so it is pretty hard to imagine. I would guess yes.

  • backroads

    Interesting. And she’s right about Houston. I try to visit often and enjoy my visits!

Showtime Book
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Once again, Jeff Pearlman has produced an exhaustively researched, elegantly written book that re-creates one of the most colorful and memorable teams of the modern era. No basketball fan's bookshelf will be complete without it.

— Seth Davis, author of Wooden: A Coach's Life