I don’t think Donald Trump should be president.
I don’t think the Mets should have fired Willie Randolph.
I don’t think Billy Joel needs to be performing every month at Madison Square Garden.
These are debatable positions. But here’s one that is not: Pickles do not belong in vending machines. They just don’t. And when I walked through Atlanta’s airport this morning, and stumbled upon the above scene, well … no. No, no, no, no, no. Just wrong.
Now that the elections are over; now that the Mueller Investigation seems to be nearing a close; now that Jacob deGrom won the NL Cy Young Award—I have a new cause. And I’d like you to join me. We must cross the United States and, one machine at a time, replace bagged pickles with cookies or crackers or even used shards of hardened gum.
But no pickles.